28: Big Dick Rock Stars

"It’s really quite frightening." - Nigel T

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We’ve Got Armadillos in Our Trousers

Research

Of course I tried to find out more about this trend, which was largely over by the early 80s, but there aren’t many articles about it! I recall a clip in some Rock History somewhere with a man claiming to know that Elvis Presley put a bit of rubber hose in his trousers so it would look like a swinging weiner, but I cannot find confirmation -and now wonder how this dude would have known. THIS piece of journalism claims Elvis just truly had himself a coke bottle.

THIS crazy video, which feels like it was made by an AI ripping this article (same pics) boasts plenty of pictures of big dinks in pants, but no analysis. See? AI is a dope. Your job is safe.

Conclusions

Good news folks - turns out most penises are just “regular.”

Have a nice day. This will be the last time we talk about penises here.

love,
your father