Big Day Coming

Let’s be undecided

I’m retiring, in 12 months, from the teaching job that’s defined my adult life so far.

It’s a process, as you can imagine. I am treading carefully into the transition, because I hate transitions and do whatever I can to mitigate them. I started telling people I was 40 when I was 37, just to get used to it. I pack as soon as I know I have to move, which is never actually helpful. So I’m reducing my hours next school year, just to practice not being a teacher sometimes.

I’m not old - I’ll be under 60 when I finish - but I am pretty burned out on the place I work, if not the actual job of teaching. And since I can, I’m going to do something else now: write and make art all day long (and tag along on Marjan’s travels).

In a lot of ways, it’s a good time to transition out. I’m very worried about all the global goddam catastrophes lining up to happen, and I (a) want to do more stuff and see more of the world, (b) don’t want to die at or for work, and (c) don’t know how to talk to kids about it all anymore. Not, at least, while pretending to know why their homework is important, or why they should use or not use whichever tech. I don’t have any sense of the future anymore, and I don’t carry any faith that we’re going to become any more responsible in time to avoid terrible mistakes.

Right Now

This summer I’m trying to reconnect with my attention span, which is really damaged. I’m trying to read again, and I’m trying to re-grow my meditation habit, and I’m trying to drink less. All three feel difficult but doable. Willpower snowballs just like bad habits do, so I’m hoping to be onto another set of goals by the end of summer. I intend to share my progress here. I know I’m not alone in feeling lost or out of control.

To be continued. Soon.

A Comic About Birds and How They act Sometimes

A Fantastic Idea

Rutger Bergman rules.

I hope you’re doing alright.

Love,

Santa